Rethinking Ritual: Connecting with the Self
Rethinking Ritual: Connecting with the Self By Jahaan Premji
Yoga. Meditation. Reflection. Silence. Evening and morning rituals. One of the connecting purposes behind these powerful practices is to get to know ourselves – our truest selves.
What happens, though, when we forget this purpose? When these powerful practices turn into places of stress and pressure where we fight to get things done just to check them off of our list or complete them because we’re told to?
This blog is all about Rethinking Ritual so that, instead of being nervous and hard on ourselves when we aren’t able to make dramatic shifts in our lives, we can take a moment, step back and remember the purpose… to connect to our truest selves.
Robin Sharma’s words ring in my mind when I think about changing the way we understand ritual. He said: small, daily, seemingly insignificant improvements, when done consistently over time, do yield staggering results.
That’s just it. Instead of, one day, convincing yourself that you are going to drastically change your life by following a formulaic and pre-established routine, focus instead on listening to your internal dialogue as opposed to completing the ritual itself. Every day, make the goal to silence the chatter in the mind enough to listen to what it is your body, mind, and spirit truly need. The greatness in this ability to listen is recognizing that what you need will change every single day…and that’s perfectly okay. Listening to what you need, consistently, will yield staggering results.
How do we re-think ritual, then? I would suggest that the greatest way to carry out ritual is to have an idea of what you want your daily life to be filled with: practices, ways of thinking, foods to consume.
Then, once you have an idea of all the wonderful moments and thought processes and goals your day may contain, take it one step at a time. One morning you may need extra sleep, another morning you may need yoga, the next morning you may skip movement altogether and spend time reflecting on recent emotions. It is okay if ritual looks different every day, if it lasts longer some days than others, if it feels different if it happens in an inconsistent order.
Again, the point is to create space to lean into our inner selves enough to know what we need, even when it feels different from what others are doing – that is the greatest gift: to follow your own needs and desires and choose exactly what ritual is best for you in a specific moment.
Human beings benefit immensely from routine. Having some semblance of a routine allows us to predict what frequency is coming next so our bodies can relax in the moment away from our innate fight or flight tendencies. However, I would suggest that a strong routine doesn’t need to look identical every day for it to serve its purpose.
This is how I’ve struck a balance between the need for ritual in my life, but recognizing that every day will inevitably be different. I compartmentalize my days into four distinct and easy to remember phases - morning, afternoon, evening, and pre-sleep. I have established a list of possible rituals that I
can choose from within each – I hope they resonate with you too:
Morning
Immediate Ayurvedic tongue scraping and mouth cleansing
A moment to gaze at the stillness outside
Sun salutations or a 20-minute yoga practice followed by pranayama and meditation
Reflection – a moment to write down a list of things I have immense gratitude for
Planning – making a list of all that I want to accomplish in the day
Sipping on lukewarm water before transitioning to my morning coffee
Watering my plants
Lighting incense or a candle
Afternoon
Yoga practice
Afternoon walk outside without my phone
Cleaning an area of my home to declutter my space and mind
Working on passion projects – making candles or mists or lotions or prepping for campaigns
Evening
Abhyanga (Ayurvedic self-massage with any oil that aligns with your Dosha) prior to a shower
Dry brushing prior to a shower
Steaming my face
Restorative yoga practice
Spending time away from my phone and television and connecting with my partner
Lighting incense or a candle
Pre-Sleep
No time on my phone in the 45 minutes – 60 minutes before bed
Cleansing and moisturizing my face and lips
Taking Ashwagandha or whatever natural supplements complement your body and constitution
Reading 20 pages of whatever book I’m working through
If we spend small moments putting aside the chaos and feeling through to what we really need in any given moment, we can pick and choose what rituals we feel called to and honor them in their fullness. The beauty in this practice is that every day will look different but your ability to ground your energy will be heightened through the use of these powerful rituals – their purpose will be restored and you will feel it within you in the way that you (and we) crave so deeply.
